(Für die deutsche Version siehe eigenen Blogeintrag.)
First, it comes differently and secondly as one thinks.
If anything applies to this month, it’s probably this ancient wisdom.
The image becomes clearer. An equalization is clearly noticeable. Nevertheless, we are still touched at our "trigger points" or old wounds, so that they can heal, we lose the charge on them, develop a greater equanimity and are less and less in a reactive attitude towards the world when certain buttons are pushed within us.
Why does it only seem to be about the finger in the wound?
It’s our wounds, which, at the same time, reflect our protective mechanisms in the form of blockages and resistances which act in us like (on autopilot). You may ask yourself, e.g., if you have tried everything in the professional world over and over again, why it still hasn’t come to a blossom so far? Or why you can completely unlatch with trifles or fall into a total impotence, being no longer capable of anything else for the rest of the day (perhaps even days) – trifles that may appear entirely secondary for others; Or that you are extremely sensitive to some topics, so that you reply – without intending or wanting to do so – very harsh and your counterpart doesn’t have a clue what’s going on. Through the perception of our wounds and the conscious look, also our mechanisms in life are revealed to us, and this is, in return, the gift of this time. Observe yourself in this awareness very carefully and deliberately in these weeks.
These mechanisms are old. These are things that come from childhood (or yet from quite other times), old imprints. They were once relevant because, as children, we didn’t have that freedom of choice, and there was no other mode for us to protect us (than to withdraw, to mute, or to trample widely to be heard at all). As grown-ups, these mechanisms are unconsciously living in us and, more likely, keep us away from bringing into the world for what we have actually come here – each individual in its very unique way. To that extent, this has nothing to do with a “rummaging in the past" as it’s often called negatively, according to the motto "don’t touch the wounds and rather put a plaster over them". In this way, our lives may continue, but we haven’t really lived. So, on the contrary, it’s about you here, today, now.
We are in the middle – and this will continue to be the underlying theme in 2017 – of the often predicted transition from the energy of the mind, which would like to heal everything in the sense of "fixing" or "getting rid of" and the energy of the heart, which embraces ALL; Which is the foundation of all of us: LOVE. And for which we need neither a right to exist nor something to prove because we are that love. It is also something other than self-love. This presupposes that there is a self which is separate from you in order to love it. Love includes self-love.
Healing means to recognize you in your entire depth. Healing always has something to do with reconnection, with waking up, and not with "getting rid of". It’s something else to, e.g., free oneself from sadness or to give freedom to sadness. This is truly a paradigm shift! Can you feel the difference? It should feel relieving. Yes! In this trust you may allow yourself to sink into now. Then the sadness or the rage can truly melt. To hold yourself as love that you are in all your emotions is the "understanding" of the new time – a "standing" in yourself. Not because you do a lot or make great efforts, but because you open yourself. Only if you can be close to yourself in this manner, you can be really close to someone else without losing yourself.
This is the path of radical love. And it can be the resistance to a feeling or your heart, which might perhaps be (still) close at the moment – there is nothing, even if it’s still so painful and terrible, perhaps abysmal, which wouldn’t always have been accepted. Even if the mind adds its judgements and divides between good and bad or allowed and forbidden. When he tells us that we are "wrong" or a failure as we are. All this is also accepted in what you are. As anger and fear are accepted. And grief and shame and guilt. Love doesn’t ask whether it’s all taking far too long or says it should be different.
It’s a month in which much, as already mentioned, happens unexpectedly. It may, e.g., be that you planned a great meal with the family at Christmas and, at the end, you find yourself all on your own, with your partner or your best friend at the table. Or the other way around – you intended this year to be for yourself and to withdraw a little from the hustle and bustle and then suddenly the whole house is full and the neighbors from vis-à-vis also ring at the door. So it’s playful in all directions. It doesn’t always have to be the past or some old pattern again. On the contrary. Let yourself be surprised. As I said, it can be love itself that meets you! The unconscious is different from the ego. It likes to learn something and is looking forward to it!
Due to the unpredictability, it’s to be expected that moods and feelings can change very rapidly and above all can arise very abruptly. Therefore, to be close to yourself is the most important in this time. To be fully with what is at this moment. For the mind it may repeat itself – that’s the story, the narrative, which it constructs. The heart knows only this moment. And it's always fresh. It wasn’t yesterday and won’t be tomorrow, but always now. Everything is held in your presence. That's love. And it’s so close, closer than this body, that – in the exhausting effort to see it, to find it (somewhere in the outside), we miss it for a long time. Flip the binoculars. It’s you and with all always welcome.
In an unpredictable manner as things change in the outside, you will encounter some of your unconscious core beliefs. Hallelujah!! You suddenly wake up in the middle of the night or sit quite mundane in the subway. So you won’t be wondering any more why, in your life, you are almost always in a permanent state of just before the collapse, when there is something running in you like "only if I do/work a lot, I am valuable!". Or something like that, e.g., which has been sitting in me for a long time, and I’ve been asking myself for many years, from where only this writing blockage comes, although words are really my medium. Well, if there is such a thing as "only intellectually overblown and scientifically proven texts are worth something", then it’s for the intuitive wisdom in you, which may and want to come out, of course, a little hard. Only you are the one who can move and expand your own boundaries. Don’t wait for others to do it. That will never happen. It’s about taking yourself courageous under your arm. If you want. If you want to live truly and don’t want to be "lived" anymore, and therewith often are uselessly also busy in making the outside responsible for your situation.
Become essential – this is the key in this month and beyond. Otherwise, you’ll almost inevitably get the feeling of losing any grounding, because everything is so much and goes so fast and feels even faster and more. To become essential is crucial and has nothing to do with being inactive. Who are the people you just really want to have around you? Three are often more than 3000 friends. How much alone-time do you actually need? It may be that it’s more or has become more in the last few weeks. Then pay heed to that, even if your mind (or the one of others) says that you are boring or that you close yourself off from life. What do you effectively want to do and what do you do to confirm, be good or keep up your (own) image of yourself? An important first step here can already be the observation itself and thus the conscious realization. Years or decades of structures can’t be changed overnight, which would also overwhelm our organism. Step by step. Only use this time-quality, in which the insights and experiences now suddenly appear, just like shooting stars from the sky.
Wake up and discover the thread, which is what you are: LOVE!
I wish you all a wonderful month and a gentle end to this so-moving year. I am deeply grateful for the connection with all of you, with you, who you are reading these lines right now, and with this ever-expanding field of love, emptiness and awareness. How privileged we are to live in this time!
PS: I would be very happy to know what touches you when you read the ETUP. Is it resonating with your life? Please feel free to share and write your comment, here or on my facebook page. It's nice for me, too, to be in this way in contact with you all!
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I'm looking forward to connecting with you!